Tuesday, October 13, 2026

Film review: Caught Stealing (2025)


This is one of those movies that would have been a hit in another age, but isn't a sequel or a superhero movie, so died a death at the box office.  It's set in probably the last year it would have been guaranteed to succeed, 1998, when mid-size crime movies with tightly-written plots and good dialogue (and a lot of violence) were commonly bankable.  It's even got a proven director (Darren Aronofsky, for whom this is an uncharacteristically straightforward, mainstream(ish) film) and is packed with recognizable actors, including its star, the blue-eyed cornfed Austin Butler, 


fairly fresh off playing Elvis.  Think of something like Marathon Man for comparison, although this one (despite all of the death, often to likeable characters who don't deserve it) has a lot more humor thrown in.  Perhaps that's what did for it - I remember they accented the humor in the trailer, and when people found it was more of a serious crime drama, featuring a protagonist with a tortured past, they felt cheated.  Or maybe it's the lack of spandex - who knows?

Anyway, it's based on a book and adapted by the author, which explains the almost-too-well-oiled plot (it's not in the least shaggy - there are no throwaway details) which, to me, anyway, makes it a little artificial.  Nonetheless, it's seamlessly executed and never boring, and all the actors are doing a great job, so if it was the movie of the night and you only had one channel, you would feel very satisfied.

Butler plays Hank, who is from a small town near San Francisco (which explains his obsession with the San Francisco Giants, which is a running subplot), where he was a high-school baseball star, expected to be drafted in the first round, except he crashed his car, killing his best friend (who was in the back, without a seatbelt, and consequently flew out the windshield and squished his head - I recognized the friend as one of the four Reservation Dogs - which means he's probably a lot younger than Butler, who is playing the younger version of himself in flashback) and (more importantly to him at the time) he destroyed his knee, thus ending his baseball dreams.  Now he lives in a supposedly shitty part of NY (but his apartment is large and looks pretty nice) and tends bar at Paul's Bar, where the owner is an ageing hippie, who is fond of him.  He's also a functional alcoholic, who drinks beer for breakfast.

Anyway, his girlfriend (played by Lisa Bonet's kid), 


with whom he has believably amiable banter, picks him up after work, and they are heading back to his place for a quickie, when they find his no-good friend Russ (Matt "Eleventh Doctor" Smith, with a cockernee geezer accent and an over-the-top (think street punk in every 80's movie) punk outfit, complete with Mohawk/Mohican) 


waiting to drop off his cat for Hank to take care of, because his father has had a stroke and he has to rush to London to be with him.  The cat ("Buddy") 


hates everyone but Hank, despite the fact that Hank is a dog person.  The girlfriend persuades him that he should keep Buddy in his apartment (Russ's is next door) and moves the litter box in.  (As I said, all details matter.) 

Pretty soon, however, things take a turn.  He catches two Russians (both bald and scary-looking, one very large, the other much smaller (but crazier) with a large wine-red face birthmark and whom the other calls "Microbe") trying to break into Russ's apartment and they kick the shit out of him until the neighbor across the hall 


(who already complained about the noise when Russ was there and when accused of being a yuppie banker, plaintively retorted "I build websites!" (still novel in 1998) peeks out and Hank yells at him to call the cops.  Then they leave and he finds that he's lying in a pool of blood and piss and says "that's not good" and passes out.  We then get the first of the flashbacks to his car crash and he wakes up with a start as the car crashes in his dream, to find himself in hospital, having had to have one of his kidneys removed.  I found that him being so vulnerable (later on the same nasties torture him by ripping out the staples closing his wound) made me anxious.

Anyway, cops come to investigate, including a sympathetic (if brusque) older black cop played by Regina King, 


who says that the people who attacked him aren't that dangerous, but they're connected with two "scary monsters" (showing him a picture of two large Hasidic Jews - who later turn out to be played by Vincent D'Onofrio and Liev Schreiber (whom I always confuse with each other)) whom he must avoid at all costs, because they like to cut people's eyes out.

Rather disgustingly, her co-officer takes a dump in his toilet and plugs it, and when he's plunging it after they've gone, he notices that the litter box has a particularly giant turd in it (very scatological, this scene) which, upon closer inspection, reveals itself to be fake, and to contain a key.  Then he hears banging next door and sees the scary monsters trying to break into Russ's apartment.

Then I get a bit muddled (I watched this a couple of nights ago) but he's threatened on the phone by the Russians - or rather, their Hispanic boss played by Bad Bunny 


- and they reveal that they know about his girlfriend ("the chica in Chinatown") with whom he has since argued with (he got drunk after going to Paul's Bar to ask him (who I only now realize was played by an unrecognizable Griffin Dunne, 


in what is almost certainly a nod to After Hours) to stash the key for him, after she told him he couldn't drink any more because of the kidney thing) and made up (she glued his wound after the staples were pulled out), and he goes over there...

Okay, I don't want to give too much away, but other scenes involve a shootout at Paul's Bar, the return of Russ, an exhibition of Hank's batting skills, some nifty driving, a hideout in a storage unit, a trip to what looks like Coney Island beach, a visit with Jewish gangsters


to their bubbe (played by Carol Kane), 


(whose presence might be a nod to another great 70s film, The Last Detail), the utter destruction of a nightclub owned by a Russian mobster, and several calls home to his mother, who was his baseball coach and to whom he is devoted (and whom we only hear over the phone until the end of the movie when her face is revealed).  Lots of period pre-9/11 New York color (Giuliani gets a mention).

Anyway, it's a love-letter to the gritty 70s crime dramas, and the neo-noirs of the 90s (think The Grifters, LA Confidential), which is probably why it flopped.  But also why you should see it.  Don't worry, the two loves of Hank's life (one that's been in it forever, one whom he never thought he'd come to love) come out of it intact.  Too bad about those Giants, though. 

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