Thursday, June 5, 2025

Crook O'Lune by E C R Lorac

We are back in Lancashire with Inspector Macdonald who, again, finds himself dealing with a murder mystery in a teeny weeny community that has been crime free since the dawn of time--except every six months or so when they are plagued with a series of crimes so mysterious that Macdonald has to leave London and put his understanding of the criminal mind and his Scottish accent to work.

This book was published in 1953 so finally we are out of WWII, rationing has officially ended, and life is returning to normal. The story begins with Gilbert Woolfall, a savvy businessman from the big city, sitting in a comfy chair by a big fire in the sitting room of his uncle Thomas Woolfall's farm house.  The uncle has recently died in an accident (or was it?) that was surprising and doubly tragic as he had just recently finished getting the family's financial messes in order and spent much of his inherited wealth on fixing up the farmhouse and outbuildings so that they are comfortable, beautiful and practical: the roof is repaired, the stone walls fortified, the kitchen plumbing fixed and the floors in the cattle barns clean, level and disease free for the first time in two centuries.  Then, just when he was hoping to actually put the farm to real use by getting "real" (profitable) cattle, he died in a "farming accident."  So here sits his nephew Gilbert who is himself nearing 50, in the perfect chair, trying to make sense of his uncle's vast piles of papers, both legal and personal. (The Woolfall's are a litigious lot so there are a lot of deeds, contracts, settlements and rental papers PLUS Uncle was nearly finished with his "tell all" book that would shine a bright light on one of the oldest--and very suspect--families in the area.)  

Soon Gilbert realizes that, though he intended to make his visit as brief as possible so he could get back to the city and his job, this house and land is the most beautiful place he's ever been and he starts to wonder if he could seriously settle down and continue his uncle's task of restoring the family's farm, wealth and legacy. Then, just when he is feeling cozy and dozy, he hears a knock on the door.  Resentfully, he gets up and lets in the rector, Mr. Tupper.  If Charles Dicken's had described Mr. Tupper, he would have used the words "pinched" to describe his face, "darting" to describe his eyes, and "jealous, resentful and greedy" to describe his personality.  Mr. Tupper feigns to welcome Gilbert to the neighborhood but his real mission is to find out if Gilbert will give him what he wants, which is a legal claim to an old rectory that is on the Woolfall land.  Gilbert quickly sizes up Tupper and tells him right out that, no, he has no intention of handing over a giant chunk of land to the church.  Then we get the full backstory: many centuries ago, a Woolfall donated a massive chunk of land to the church on condition that they would build and maintain a school providing a free education to all children in the surrounding areas.  So, they did--until just after WWI when families left farms to move to the larger nearby cities and took their children with them and the school was closed. Since the church failed to keep up their end of the bargain, the land reverted back to the Woolfalls.  Well, Tupper doesn't see things that way: he tells anyone who will listen that the Woolfalls are a bunch of cheats who stole from the church. Then the real reason comes out: he is tired of traveling over narrow, rough roads to get to a rectory in the nearest larger city (by no means a big city--but it has a pub).  Tupper wants to give his sermons in the local rectory, which is tiny.  Also, the locals don't even attend church so, really, he wants a job, a salary and control of land here all while doing nothing at all. Still Gilbert refuses.  Sputtering with rage, Mr. Tupper storms off, reminding Gilbert how poor he (Tupper) is, how crappy his car is, and how likely it is that he'll die on the roads and it will all be Gilbert's fault! You may think we are getting foreshadowing but we aren't--Tupper isn't going to die any time soon as he is a whiny jerk that hassles people throughout the whole novel. 

Seconds after Tupper leaves, Mr Hardwick shows up to have a talk, too.  According to Hardwick, Gilbert shouldn't stay as he can't really make good use of the land.  Hardwick and his adult sons, however, have been serious farmers for decades and actually know how to do an honest day's work.  PLUS--who do you think actually did all the work repairing all the buildings Gilbert is enjoying?  They did.  Of course, Gilbert points out that they were paid fairly--sure, Hardwick concedes, but that isn't the point: the issue is who deserves to be able to farm the land--the person who knows how to farm the land or the person with more money to throw at the land?  It's a tricky point and one that almost works on Gilbert. He promises to think about it.

Then, the housekeeper shows up. Will Gilbert EVER get to sit down and relax?  Mrs. Ramsey was his uncle's housekeeper and announces that she has stocked the kitchen with foods that even a man can manage to cook and that she is heading off to her sister's.  She is done working and the uncle's sudden death brought things home: she wants to retire, live with her sister and her family and enjoy what time she has left. Gilbert understands, thanks her, and wishes her well. She heads out the door to catch a ride with Mr Tupper who promised to take her to the bus stop a few miles a way.  FINALLY Gilbert gets some peace and quiet..no, in pops Betty Fell, a local farm lass with a good head on her shoulders and a strong back. She comes right out with it: Gilbert, you are useless and there is no way you are going to manage a farm and this house without help. So here is my offer:  My boyfriend and I will get married, live here and work the land. You go back to the city, work until your retirement in a couple of years and then, when you are really ready to retire, you can come back to live and by then, we'll have saved up enough money from farming your land so that we can buy a house of our own.  Hmmmm....that's the first offer that interests Gilbert: he keeps the land, keeps his job back in the city until it makes more sense to retire, and then he settles here when he's good and ready. Gilbert doesn't say yes, but he doesn't say no, and both understand that the deal barring unforeseen circumstances is as good as made.

That same day Macdonald shows up to visit friends (The Hoggetts) he made on one of his many previous visits to Lancashire when called in to solve mysteries.  He's not there on business but has decided that he really, really wants to buy land and this time he's going to do it.  The day after he arrives, he hears the news: the old Woolfall house had a fire in the celler and the house half burned down!  Fortunately, no one was in the house: Gilbert had gone back to his city job, Kate and Jock hadn't yet gotten married and moved in, his housekeeper had moved on...But then, once the smoke cleared and the house (what is left of it) is examined, the facts are revealed: the housekeeper had NOT left as Mr Tupper had refused to give her a lift to the bus station (he was mad at all Woolfalls and took it out on her) so she missed her bus and decided to spend one more night at the house before leaving the next morning. So now everyone hates Mr. Tupper even more than they did before. And Gilbert starts suspecting that his uncle didn't die because of an accident because, given that the fire would have destroyed his uncles papers thereby preventing the tell all book from being published if he (Gilbert) hadn't fortuitously moved the papers into the sitting room near the comfy chair. If someone was willing to burn a house to stop a book from being published, wouldn't they also be willing to kill the author?  So: arson and manslaughter and possibly murder and plenty of suspects (Tupper, Hardwick and anyone who wanted to stop Betty/Jock from getting a leg up). AND, just to complicate things more, there has been a rash of sheep stealing and everyone thinks that a sheep rustler is hiding behind every clump of grass.

Why steal sheep?  Because the price of wool had gone up 1000 fold so sheep are just living sacks of money with four legs. Why would sheep theives set a house on fire? yeah, that doesn't really make sense...unless they were trying to get someone who was getting in their way arrested for arson...Does that make sense? Not really.

So once again Macdonald has to emesh himself into the local culture to get people to reveal their shameful secrets. But before all is revealed we are going to have to deal with more sheep stealing, attempted murder and another murder. As for the title, the river near the land has a sharp bend in it which the locals call a "crook," one peron is nearly killed by a shepherd's staff ("crook") and the master mind is, of course, a crook--stealing sheep, trying to steal land and, in general, causing all sorts of havoc.  

So does Macdonald end up buying any land?  Nope. Here's a painting of the actual place done by J M W Turner, painted around 1818:


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