Campus Covid precautions

He just took my temperature with a little gun to the forehead.  He also checked my "Healthscreen Questionnaire" (say "no" to everything) and normally I'd scan my card, but they were having wifi issues today.

Film review: One Cut of the Dead (2017)

It's not often you hear the adjectives "charming" and "heartwarming" applied to a zombie film, but I'm going to do it.  Not that you'd really understand if you just watched the first half of this film, which appears to be a rather amateurish all-in-one-take (hence "one cut") zombie film (filmed through a filter that makes everything look sickly) about an amateurish film crew making a zombie film who are attacked by genuine zombies.  The film-maker (pictured above with the beard) turns out to be a total psycho, who performs a blood ritual specifically to raise the dead and then keeps pushing his hapless young cast into the path of the resulting zombies just to get good footage.  You develop a special loathing for this character and are happy to see him meet a grisly fate.  But then the film ends (with what looks like a crane shot) and the credits roll.  And then a new film begins, featuring all the same characters, except with the obnoxious director now as the protagonist.  I can't say any more without spoiling it, except, although this second half is slow to start, the payoff is very much worth it, and it is not only wildly enjoyable in its own right, it makes you reevaluate just about everything you saw before.  Check this one out!  It was, itself, a very low-budget production (I can't keep track of the levels of meta we've reached by this point) and released in just one cinema in Japan, but word of mouth spread like wildfire and it became an indie hit.  Even if you don't like zombie films (and perhaps especially then) you will enjoy this, trust me.

Film review: San Francisco (1936)

This is really two films in one.  The first one, that does seem to drag on a bit, is a film about two nightclub owners sparring over a woman.  The woman is warbler Mary Blake (Jeanette MacDonald), a trained opera singer from Denver trying to make it in San Francisco, but whose lodgings burn down on New Year's Eve, forcing her to take the quickest available job, which happens to be at "Blackie" Norton (Clark Gable)'s nightclub.  He likes her "pipes," if not her slow style of singing, and quickly signs her up.  However, a rival, Jack Burley (Jack Holt) recognizes that she should really be singing opera, and tries to buy out her contract.  As this is what she really wants to do, it would be nice of Blackie to let her go, but he refuses.  Gable does a great job with Blackie, who is basically a charming oaf.  The local priest (Spencer Tracy) has known Blackie since they were both kids and knows that there's good in him, but he's fallen into the shady life.  There's a good deal of back and forth (I'm skipping over the part where people try to get Blackie to run for controller to try to do something about all the fires like the one that made Mary homeless because to be honest I didn't follow it), with Blackie falling for Mary, Mary falling for Blackie, them falling out again, Mary marrying Jack (!), Jack setting up Mary in the Opera, Blackie arriving on opening night intending to enforce the contract but getting so caught up in the opera (I think it's Faust) that he actually knocks out the cop he brought along to enforce the contract so that he doesn't interrupt it.  (He does a lot of punching people - he even likes to spar with Spencer Tracy in his spare time.)  But then Jack has Blackie's nightclub shut down just as the annual competition of acts from the various clubs is happening and Mary hears about it and goes up to represent Blackie's club, and wins (of course), but then Jackie is angry and ungrateful...  and then (FINALLY) the second movie starts.  And it's spectacular.  It's a disaster move about the 1906 San Francisco earthquake, and it's quite honestly the most convincing (and harrowing) disaster movie I've ever seen.

It pulls no punches, and it must have cost a fortune, because they're obviously destroying giant sets.  Buildings fall on adults, children and horses.  Dazed spouses dash about yelling the names of their loved ones, only to find them dead in the street.  Jack gets squashed, but it's not even glorified and Blackie feels no schadenfreude, especially as he has to convey the news to Jack's mother.  Who is just about to get her house dynamited - that's another thing we see a lot of - the city blowing up large swathes of it in an attempt to contain the fire that rages out of control.  Blackie wanders about through the ruins like the main character in War of the Worlds, desperately looking for Mary.  He finds her in the end, warbling "Nearer My God to Thee" at some funeral, and is so moved to find her alive that he drops to his knees and finds God (thereby undercutting one of my favorite features of his character, that he regards religion with contempt).  It ends with a happy announcement that the fire is out and everyone (and there are a lot of them - we're talking Biblical Epic level crowd scenes) joining together and marching from where they are (which looks like fields outside the city) towards the city (or The City) singing the Battle Hymn of the Republic.  This spoils it a bit for me, I must say, but that last half-hour or so of the film is flat out incredible and makes the whole film a must-see.  I could take or leave MacDonald, and Tracy is underused, but Gable is wonderful.  I love him in It Happened One Night, and he is if anything even more impressive here.  He is such a physical and engaged performer, and in that last section his stunned reaction to the chaos and devastation is completely natural and believable.  We watched it on the recommendation of one of Jami's law professors, and clearly he has great taste.  The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance next!

Film review: The Scarlet Pimpernel (1934)

They seek him here!  They seek him there!  Those Frenchies seek him everywhere!  So goes the titular poem written by our hero, Sir Percy Blakeney, who has to play the idiot fop 

to keep his true identity a secret, and does so with great aplomb.  Leslie Howard is his excellent best, and does steely resolve and Bertie Wooster/The Prince Regent in Black Adder buffoonery equally adeptly.  Meanwhile Merle Oberon as his French wife that he spends most of the film despising 

out of a mistaken belief that she sent a family to the guillotine, swans around sighing a lot and giving penetrating stares.  There's less all-out action than you might expect (the only scene of The Pimpernel helping French aristos escape is at the start, where we see Howard dressed up as an old woman with a ridiculous fake nose, but there's lots of intrigue, and wonderful supporting players like Nigel Bruce as the kindly English prince, and Raymond Massey as the evil right-hand-man of Robespierre, 

(whom Blakeney takes great pleasure in tormenting),

along with great sets and fantastic costumes (did they really wear such silly hats and ridiculous collars?)  And the love of man and wife is restored in a rather over-the-top patriotic finale.  Great stuff, and obviously where Ray Davies got the opening line of Dedicated Follower of Fashion.  You can see why Oberon was whisked off to Hollywood shortly thereafter, though:

 

 

 

Film review: Dames (1934)

The Criterion Channel has added a collection of Joan Blondell pre-code films, and that's our jam!  We've seen several of them, but this one is packed with Busby Berkeley numbers, so definitely worth a view.  Like at least one of the others we've seen, it also features Ruby Keeler (Barbara) and Dick Powell (Jimmy), as a couple who also happen to be cousins (13th, he tells her, when she worries about it).  

They are both saplings of the Ounce family tree.  The self-styled trunk is millionaire eccentric (and Buffalo native) Ezra Ounce.  His cousin's husband (father of Barbara) is Horace P. Hemingway, whom we see being ushered to Ezra's penthouse office at the beginning of the film.  It's only his second visit, the first was for Barbara's birth, but for this one he is delighted to hear that Ezra has decided to dole out some of his millions now and not wait for his death.  The catch is that he will come to New York with Horace and stay with him for a month to make sure that he is of high enough moral fiber to deserve the money.  For uncle Ezra is a moral crusader (as well as inexplicably fond of elephants).  Well, things immediately start to go awry for Horace (who is himself pretty wealthy - something to do with sausage skins - but Ezra is offering $10 million in 1934 money, which translates to about $180 million, according to the trivia on IMDb) on the train to New York; he says goodnight to Ezra and heads to his cabin, only to find his bed already occupied by Joan Blondell's Mabel.  She was part of a show in Troy NY that suddenly got canceled, and she had no money for a cabin, so she decided to take his.  She threatens to scream if he complains, and he, naturally terrified of being cut off ("like a ripe banana"), complies.  And stupidly, the next morning he leaves a $100 bill and his card asking that she never speak of this incident.  The plot to take advantage of Horace doesn't take hold in Mabel's head until she arrives at her promoter's office at the same time that said promoter is handing a check to Jimmy having pledged to back his musical production "Sweet and Hot" after everyone else in town has turned it down.  After lambasting the promoter so much he flees "to lunch", she explains to Jimmy that the check is worthless, but on hearing that Barbara's last name is Hemingway and quickly putting two-and-two together, she makes a pact with Jimmy that she'd get him the money to finance his show if he puts her in it (he plays her a tune and she likes it - but Barbara, listening outside, gets jealous).  So Mabel sneaks into the Hemingway household and camps out in Horace's bed (fortunately for her, the Hemingways have separate bedrooms), and threatens to scream unless he finances the play.  In fact, to show she means business, she shouts "Ezra!" (by this time she knows of the $10M, which is why she knows Horace will be willing to give up a mere $25 grand), which Horace has to try to persuade his wife and Ezra was just the pipes.  Well, the show goes into rehearsals, Barbara gets a key role in it, and at the same time Ezra has founded an Ounce society for American Morals, and has heard about this new raunchy production "Sweet and Hot" and gets his narcoleptic (don't ask) bodyguard to round up a gang of toughs to break it up.  Cue the usual Busby Berkeley numbers, which, as in Footlights Parade and Gold Diggers of 1933, get clustered in the last third of the movie.  They are truly spectacular and surreal.  Feast your eyes (for some reason, Blogger doesn't let you see the full width of the screen - click on the title to have it open up in YouTube):

A running gag in the movie is that the hyper-moral Ezra is addicted to "Dr. Silver's Golden Elixir" which is 50% alcohol.  It cures his hiccups (or so he claims).  In the end scene where Ezra and the Hemingway parents are up in the balcony watching the show, and waiting to give the signal to the thugs to break it up, they're chugging down the new EXTRA STRENGTH (70% alcohol) version and get well and truly sloshed.  As a result, they love the show, and Ezra changes his mind about cutting Henry off "like a ripe avocado" which he initially says he'll do when he sees Barbara in the show.  All-in-all, top entertainment.  Everyone in it is good (shout-out to Mrs. Hemingway, Zazu Pitts, of the "fidgety hands," who is a seasoned comedienne and shows it) and the productions are, as always, racy, surreal, and gobsmackingly intricate.  And I bet you didn't know until now that this was where "I only have eyes for you" comes from.

Film review: Lola (1961)

I couldn't get my laptop to work with the TV, so we watched a film we actually own, which is the first film in the Jacques Demy box set.  It's very well-regarded, but it seems like a bit of a dry run for the themes of his later films, only without the musical numbers.  In fact, its main male character features in Umbrellas - he's the one who ends up marrying Deneuve's character in that (and talks about how his heart was broken earlier, which refers to this film).  Basically Roland Cassard is a listless young man

living in Nantes (Remy's own home town) but not loving it.  He gets fired from his job early on in the film for always showing up late, essentially because he doesn't care about it.  Meanwhile "Lola" is a dancer who is shown hooking up with Frankie, 

an American sailor (who sounds very French when he's supposedly speaking "American", but apparently the actor really was born in New Jersey), who reminds her of the father of her seven year old son, Michel (the father, not the son) 

(who looks disturbingly like Howard from Better Call Saul) who left to pursue his fortune and hasn't returned.  Roland bumps into Lola on the way to get a job that will help him escape Nantes, and she recognizes him.  In fact, they were schoolmates, and her real name is Cécile (which is also the name of the just-turning-14 daughter 

of a woman, Madame Desnoyers,

also sans man, whom he meets in a bookstore just before, and whom he tells about the other Cécile), and he loved her deeply.  This meeting of course rekindles the love for him, and gives him new meaning in life.  Nonetheless, he pursues the job, which involves the boss of a hairdresser's giving him a briefcase to take through Amsterdam to Johannesburg, no questions asked, but he has a couple of days to kill before departing.  He uses this to pursue Lola, who makes no secret that she can only love Michel, and to get needlessly jealous of Frankie, whom Lola allows to sleep at her place because he's used up all his leave money.  He also goes for meals at the home of the young Cécile and her mother, and the mother pines for him, clearly.  The daughter, meanwhile, bumps into Frankie when they both want the last copy of a space comic called "Meteor", and she develops a (unrequited, thankfully) crush on Frankie.  It all comes to a head when the hairdresser gets busted for diamond smuggling, Frankie leaves for Cherbourg, young Cécile also leaves for Cherbourg (ostensibly to visit her mother's brother-in-law (and unbeknownst to her, her real father), to learn hairdressing, but we know it's to pursue Frankie), and Michel returns a rich man to the delighted arms of Lola.  (Michel is also the son of the owner of the cafe that Roland mopes about in - as you can see, the coincidences that reach a ridiculous peak in Rochefort are already a theme, along with young mothers without their men.)  Last shot of the movie is Lola looking out of the big car that she's being driven in by Michel at the sight of Roland walking off to find his fortune elsewhere, case in hand.  So, as I said, lots of themes that Demy will revisit - along with those I've mentioned, there's people loving people who don't love them back, and how silly but at the same time earthshaking young love is.  There are some lyrical scenes, too, including a funfair (that is spoilt somewhat by the queasiness of it being Frankie escorting a besotted 14-year-old through it) and Nantes comes off very well, naturally.  

I think we're supposed to be besotted with Lola (Anouk Aimée), 

but while she is quite affecting, and perfect for the role, she isn't up there with the Deneuves, Moreaus or Karinas.  A slight picture, as all of Demy's are really, but its mood draws you in and sticks with you.

Film review: Get Duked! (2019)

 

This film, which just popped up on Amazon, was apparently called "Boys In The Wood" when it was released in Britain, judging by the reviews on Rotten Tomatoes. At first I thought that was a much better title, but actually the phrase "Get Duked!" does feature fairly prominently, and also there is a noticeable (and commented on) absence of woods in the Scottish Highlands, where the film is set.  The film itself was entertaining enough, but, despite its copious swearing, occasional bloody violence and repeated drug use, I'd say it was ideally pitched at a thirteen-year-old audience, as there are a couple of rather earnest scenes of "we're all fellow outcasts bonding" that crusty old cynic me could have done without.  So what's it about, you ask?  Well, the "Duke" of the title refers to the Duke of Edinburgh award, which, for the three hoodlum boys (top three in the poster) is punishment for blowing up the lavatory block at their school (13-year-old humor), while the fourth is an earnest home-schooled boy who seems to think a Duke of Edinburgh award will look good on his resume for University.  Starting top left and going clockwise the boys are Duncan, the Vyvyan from the Young Ones of the bunch (just as thick, but a bit more amiable), DJ Beatroot (whose real name is much posher), the self-styled future of hip hop, whose family is rich and has just moved up from London, Dean, the son of an alcoholic fish-factory employee, who is brighter than he looks (and acts) and Ian, the home schooler.  They are dropped off by their substitute teacher Mr Carlyle with instructions (and a map) on how to reach the campsite where he will meet them to camp for the night.  He then vanishes in the minivan.  It doesn't take long for the reprobate three to use a vital section of the map as rolling paper for a giant doobie that may contain cannabis tar, or may just contain tar.  They wander aimlessly for a while, bumping into a tractor-driving farmer, 

who warns them how fatal the countryside is, and on whom DJ offloads his debut CD, and finding a pair of boots that DJ (whose fancy footwear means he is slowing them down) refuses to wear, but that we the audience see came from the feet of a corpse poorly-buried nearby.  In fact, there have been ominous foreshadowings for a while, starting with all the posters for lost and missing children on the noticeboard by the drop off point.  And there is the shadowy figure in the distance, who finally reveals himself (to us) as Eddie Izzard, as a strange masked toff, whom the boys suspect of being the real Duke of Edinburgh, and in refer to as "the Duke".  He gives a little spiel about "culling" the errant youth and starts taking potshots at the boys.  They fashion a bomb out of a primus stove and make good their escape, after succeeding in setting fire to his trouser leg.  To Mr. Carlyle's (and their) surprise, they make it to the campsite in double-quick time, but Dean (who is high as a kite, having eaten the turd of a magic-mushroom-eating rabbit) 

notices that Mr. Carlyle has a burnt leg, and they suspect him of being the Duke.  Duncan takes it on himself to run Mr. Carlyle over with the minivan, which leaves them with a corpse to dispose of, which they attempt to do by putting him at the wheel of the minivan as it goes over a cliff, only it doesn't - it rolls backwards down the road and disappears (but don't worry, it'll be back).  Meanwhile, an inept pair of local cops is responding to the call that Duncan managed to make in the scant moment he got one bar on his phone ("there's no phone reception in the Highlands, ya numpty" as Mr. Carlyle said) and are on the lookout for terrorists or a drug gang, when in fact they should be looking for a bread thief who has been plaguing all the Highland towns and villages.  Anyway, Eddie Izzard, and another masked figure who turns out to be his wife ("The Duchess") return to plague the boys, 

and captures Ian, who sprains his ankle and is left behind by the others.  They in turn split up, when DJ insists on entering a scary-looking barn (which turns out to be a Farmers' rave, where they're all listening to the CD he gave the tractor-driver earlier and greet him as a conquering hero 

[and they evidently love his DJ name, which is a sore point as Dean has just pointed out how stupid it sounds] and introduce him to the "Highland Secret" that Dean accidentally discovered earlier of the hallucinogenic rabbit turds), while the other two go and hide in a cave.  Poor old Ian is trussed up, made to look like a fox (hence the hat in the poster) and it looks like a Wicker Man folk horror style fate is going to befall him as the couple approach him chanting pagan stuff and waving a sword.  Cue a rescue from the others.  Then the boys seek revenge on the couple, but little do they know how many other Dukes there are around.  Will the police capture the bread thief?  Did the Duke of Edinburgh really start this whole thing as an excuse to hunt urban youth?  Is Mr. Carlyle really dead?  Will Ian get the laminated certificate he craves?  Will the boys learn the skills the award was supposed to inculcate?  Will the van show up again?  Many of those questions are answered in what follows, along with some humorous fork-related antics.  As I said, a pleasant enough diversion, much aided by the sympathetic performances of the four leads.  (The adults tend to be a bit too cartoonish for my tastes.)