Film review: The Mermaid (2016)

This is directed by Stephen Chow, the auteur responsible for the masterpieces Shaolin Soccer and Kung Fu Hustle, the latter of which was declared by Bill Murray to be "the supreme achievement of the modern age in terms of comedy".  Chow is certainly responsible for the best slapstick seen since Jackie Chan's apogee (and before that, Buster Keaton) and this film is no exception. Trust me, if you're in the mood for extreme silliness (and who isn't?) then you should check this out.  You will be far from alone, because apparently it was (and possibly still is) the most successful film in China's history.  The plot is pretty simple: billionaire Liu Xuan (who favors shiny suits that look like they're made of lizard skin, and chunky rings, so we can tell he's shallow) has acquired a bay that his equally rich competitors think is worthless because it's under an environmental order but has also had sonars installed to drive away the protected wildlife and thus can develop it.  Unbeknownst to him, the sonars have trapped a community of mermaids (no gender-neutral name is offered, even though there are examples of both sexes, a problem highlighted by Spongebob's Mermaid Man) in an old beached tanker.  They send a disguised one of their own to assassinate him, but after having failed in her first attempt (an inspired piece of slapstick, involving poison anemones) manages to fall in love with him.  And he with her, which enrages the rich beauty who is trying to become both business and romantic partner.  And that's about all you need.  It's all just setups for slapstick and Stephen Chow's patented "character who is bullshitting while in pain manages to maintain the bullshit through a series of agonizing pratfalls" humor (one example this time is a half-octopus mermaid man disguised as a chef who is called upon to cook his own tentacles - that one was a bit grisly).  Two other standouts are the opening scene, unrelated to the rest, where a hustling "museum" owner presents outrageous fakes as dinosaurs, mermaids, et. al., and a scene where Liu Xuan has escaped from being kidnapped by the mermaids and tries to convince the police of this.  He says that they were "half-man, half-fish" and the series of sketches they come up with is inspired.  If you want to get a good sampling, try this.  But I recommend the whole film - me and millions of Chinese people can't be wrong.